Congratulations on your engagement!
We are delighted that you wish to take your vows before God, and wish to help make your wedding personal, enjoyable and meaningful for you. Contact the minister about a date in good time and before any other arrangements are firmed up. Thinking ahead To pre-empt issues which sometimes cause difficulties, it is good to think over practical points, e.g. finances, working overtime, family, smoking in the house, holidays, having nights out with the boys/girls, etc.
The service is something like a blueprint for the kind of home you wish to have … it can be helpful to think through what you think makes a home a home! If you share with the minister something of the kind of home you wish to have, the service can then be made more personal. Underlying values are important, e.g. it is helpful to consider the Christian faith that we are valuable to God with Whom we can have a personal relationship through Jesus Christ. The minister is very willing to chat this over with you if you wish.
Sometimes people wish to have someone reading the Bible passage at the service. Some possible passages are Psalm 100; Psalm 145.3-13; John 15.9-15; I Corinthians 13; Philippians 4.4-8; Colossians 3.12-17; I John 4.9-19
You both need to complete and return a Marriage Notice form obtainable from the local registrar, and - at least 29 days before your wedding - return it to the registrar with
i. your birth certificate
ii. evidence of where you live, for example a bank statement with your address
iii. death or divorce certificate if previously married
iv. if you’re not from the UK, you also need to complete and return a declaration of status with your passport or another document that provides evidence of your nationality and
a certificate that you are free to marry under the law of your own country
v. the fee for the registrar
One of you in person must collect from the registrar the marriage schedule which is signed during your wedding ceremony, and ensure that the minister has it 15 minutes before the service …. or oops the service cannot proceed! You can collect this from the registrar in the 7 days before your wedding. The schedule needs to be returned within 3 days of your wedding. It can be sent by post.
Ask the minister about passport arrangements if you are going abroad for a honeymoon.
Some practical points
Photographs may be taken as the bride comes in, during the signing of the register and as the couple leave the church. Guests are to be asked to switch off mobile phones and to refrain from taking photographs during the actual service, as this can be distracting to the couple. Your photographer should make contact with the minister in advance of the service.
If you wish a video taken, it is set up to run throughout the service. The law requires an additional fee paid to organist when a video is being taken.
The organist is happy to give advice on the choice of music, and is given first opportunity to play music at the wedding. Contact us for the cost.
There are no fees for the minister.
There is a cost for heating/lighting/opening and cleaning the church (£100 for members and £150 for non-members) and people may wish to give a donation towards the maintenance of the building. This and the fee should be paid to the Treasurer two weeks before the date of the wedding.
Cars at Aberdalgie should be parked in the church car park. Forteviot has a small carpark, and cars should be parked on one side of the road only (an usher should ensure that is the case!)
Biodegradable confetti may be thrown outside the church, not inside nor for safety reasons on the road.
Guide and assistance dogs only are allowed in the church.
Flowers may be placed on the flower pedestal and large windowsills, not on the communion table. Arrangements should be made with the elder/church officer for the church to be open to allow flowers to be put in.
If you are having a reception, it can be helpful to give travelling instructions and a timetable for the day, remembering that children and frail folk can find it rather wearying if there is a long gap between the end of the service and grace at the start of a meal!
What you do about speeches is up to you. Some people have them before a meal. The order of speeches is up to you, but traditionally is has been welcome and toast to the couple (by bride’s father), reply by the groom who proposes a toast to the bridesmaid(s), reply by best man who reads greetings (helpfully highlighting any key person who for health or distance reasons is unable to be present).